PattiStanger.net

Celebrity or not... being single SUCKS. Dating, on the other hand… well, dating can suck too. BUT it doesn’t have to! There are numerous simple steps and guidelines you can follow that can help make your dating life so much easier, not to mention a whole lot more fun!

THE OVERVIEW:

First of all, the first date is often considered an audition… if you’ve got a cute, petite figure… show it off by putting on a revealing mini (let’s see those stems!). If you’re vertically challenged, run out and get a hot pair of platforms! Remember, the girl who gets the part is generally the most sexually appealing - so, BREAK OUT THE PUSH UP BRA – L.A. is not the only place that’s all about the BOOBS!

IT’S NOT JUST THE CLOTHES! Men love to put their hands through long, silky hair – make sure your ends are perfectly straight and flat-ironed. If you’re a fun chick, the best offense is a defense! Surprise attack them with a flawless, angelic face –that means throw away your ‘goth’ make-up! Stick with a little blush, eyeliner, mascara, lip gloss and a hint of bronze… it goes a long way. Girl Next Door beauty can totally create the “WOW” factor! Also, SMELL GOOD, not like Grandma! Citrus scents like lemon or grapefruit will make him want to taste you… Did anyone say “kiss me”?

AVOID MISTAKES:

We all know the ex was a jerk, but does your date really need to know? The fact that you’ve been married once is a commodity in a city like L.A. - use it to your advantage! When “ex” talk comes up, simply say to your date (with your sweetest voice), “Lets not talk about him, he’s in the past, I’d much rather talk about you!” Then never mention it again. IF the guy persists, then you know he’s NOT your guy… and MOVE ON . Only gossip queens, and I do mean “queens”, like to talk about past relationships.

ESCAPE PLANS:

If you’re on a physical date and things aren’t going the way you want – you’re gasping for air, you want to scratch your skin off, you can’t stand looking at his face for a second more – here’s what you do: Simply tell your date, “I really don’t feel you and I are a match (ouch!). And because you’re such a great guy, I don’t want to waste any more of your time. I think I’m going go, but I wish you best of luck in your love search!” Don’t forget to say “thank-you” for drinks and/or dinner, and politely leave. Oh, and remember, it’s always a good idea to have an emergency K of at least $100 in your purse to escape if needed! Especially in cases where you didn’t drive… and you need money for a cab!

A little easier is the “phone date”. If the two of you are talking, but don’t seem to connect - say the same thing (“I really don’t feel you and I are a match… blah blah blah”), but be sure to add “You sure do sound like a great guy, if I know of anyone for you, I’ll send them your way! I hope you’ll do the same for me!” Remember, ALWAYS get the referral! A referral date can end up being your husband!